Monday, June 05, 2006

Torrents

We went to the first of a six week series of childbirth classes tonight, along with about ten other couples, all due within a few days or weeks of our due date. Brett, bless his heart, valiantly stayed awake and even asked a few questions. But I have to admit that tonight was stultifyingly boring. Things should pick up next week as we start watching videos (a concept that still horrifies me - do I have to see it before it actually happens?), and start learning about things we don't already know.

The best part of tonight was when the daddies-to-be had to stand up behind their partner's chairs and practice various forms of relaxation touches -- touching our foreheads, jaws, neck, and shoulders to help us focus on releasing tension there. "We should practice this part a LOT at home, I think," I whispered to Brett afterwards. He smirked.

I've been fairly unprone to mood swings in the first six months of this pregnancy, which I feel proud of, and which also makes me hope that the fact that this has drastically changed in the last week is marginally acceptable.

Surely I get some credit for the fact that I made it this long without any major teary episodes or insane rages right? Even if, on the way to class tonight, I went through the full emotional gamut from getting insanely angry at other drivers, to crying for a mile or two about how Brett gets to go have fun camping this summer while I have to be fat and pregnant and sick the whole time and will Never Have Any Fun Again, to silliness and laughter, to to flopping around in agony from HOWBADLYIHAVETOPEEANDCANYOUFINDMEABATHROOMRIGHTFRICKINGNOW?

What fun that must have been. Brett, to his credit, handled it well.

And then during class, the emotional torrent quietly turned to the utterly lovestruck. Watching him flip through his handouts and examine the diagrams on the whiteboard closely, all for me, all for my sake, I was suddenly struck by how amazingly glad I am that Brett is going to be in the room with me when I actually have to produce this baby, how strong and steadfast he is, how much comfort I get just from his arms around me and how much I'll need that then, how there's no one else who could ever help me so much in a scary situation like birth might be -- and this, in turn gets me all weepy. He's such a Good Man. *sob* I love him so much. *sniffle*

I'm tired just writing all of this. :) Perhaps tomorrow will be a little less... dramatic.

1 comment:

JMBalaya said...

It sounds like you are saying that the little hairy dude is good for something afterall. Am I getting that right?

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